Friday, March 20, 2015

The Birthday Interview


      Hey y’all!  It’s Bentley and I am doing today’s post as a birthday present for my mom.  Today is not just the first day of spring, or World Frog Day, but it is also her happy birthday!  She is really, really, really old vintage.  I think she shared a school locker with Methuselah.  I’m going to ask her a few birthday questions about her past.  I’m sure that she will be very excited to be able to relax and scratch my belly while I ask the tough questions.
Bentley: “Happy birthday Mom.  Can I get you a pillow or a new hip?  I know at your age it is important to keep you comfy, so you don’t get a cramp or stove up on me.”
Mom:  “Thanks Bentley.  I am fine for now, no numbness, no cramps, no need for a hip.  Do you have real questions for me?”
Bentley: “You cut me to the quick.  Who is the lead anchor on BFTB NETWoof News?  I didn’t get that anchor seat by doing fluff pieces.  I’m going to start with a question that has been bothering me.  You said that your first dog was a Beagle named Barney.  Mom…I watch television.  Barney was a dinosaur.  You don’t have to pretend with me.” 
Mom:  “Come on Bentley, dinosaurs weren’t roaming the earth when I was a kid.  I’m not that old!  You are talking about the purple kid’s dinosaur named Barney!  My Barney was definitely not a purple dinosaur.”
Bentley: “Hmmm, ‘The lady doth protest too much, methinks.’  That’s from Shakespeare’s Hamlet.  You remember little Billy Shakespeare from grade school, don’t you?”
Mom:  “Billy Shakespeare…good grief, Bentley.  Exactly how old do you think I am today?”
Bentley: “From the looks of your cake, I’m guessing 100 or 101.  You’re not going to light all of those, are you?  Talk about global warming.”
Mom:  “Why don’t you make sure the fire department is on speed dial?  I’ll eat your piece of cake.”
Bentley: “Wait, I still have a few questions.  I was looking through some of your baby pictures.  I didn’t see any with your family’s covered wagon.  I thought there would be at least one of you on the Chisholm Trail.” 
Mom:  “Bentley!  My family did not own a covered wagon!”
Bentley: “Oh, I’m sorry.  Y’all were really poor, huh?”
Mom: “Nobody owned a covered wagon!  People drove cars when I was a child.  I have never ridden the Chisholm Trail.  We traveled on the roads and highways.”
Bentley: “Oh, my bad!  How about electricity, did you have inside lighting?”    
Mom:  “Look, I was born after the invention of electricity and before you ask, I had running water and an indoor toilet too. 
Bentley: “Okie dokie.  Simmer down; I don’t want you getting yourself all excited.  It’s probably best to keep someone of your advanced age calm.  Here, try petting my head.  That’s supposed to help.”
Mom:  “I’m perfectly calm.  You seem to think I am much older than I really am today.”
Bentley: “I am just going on the amount of mail that you get from those people at AARP.  You seem to be one of their favorite causes.  What did you do for entertainment back in the day?  Did you text message your friends all of the time?”    
Mom:  “There was no such thing as text messaging.  No cell phones.  Telephones were attached to the wall by a cord too, so you couldn’t walk around and talk.  The only time that you read a message from a friend or loved one was when they wrote you a letter or a note that was folded and passed to you between classes in school.  For entertainment , we watched one of three channels on our television or we could go the drive-in theater.” 
Bentley: Ah-ha!  I knew it!  I’ve seen those drive-in movies on The Flintstones.  Did you bring Barney the “Beagle” to stick his head through the top of your foot-pedaled car?  I wish that I’d know you back then.  I’d love to sit on a dino’s head and watch a movie.”
Mom:  “The Flintstones are a cartoon family.  We didn’t have to pedal our car and again, there were no dinosaurs.”
Bentley: “Sure, sure, sure.  *wink-wink  According to this article, you are what is known as a baby-boomer.  I saw something on the news this week that said people who start a new career at your age are late bloomers.  You know that you started writing three years ago and started blogging a little over one year ago.  Hmmm, very interesting.  Let me do a little scribbling here.  Yep, it’s official!  You are a late bloomer baby-boomer.  Try saying that five times fast.  No don’t, I wouldn't want you to pull a muscle.”
Mom: “You are too good to me, Bentley.  Let’s go eat some cake.”
Bentley: “Happy birthday Mom!”     
Today is the Pet Parade Blog Hop!  We have grown from just a few blogs parading with us to a Mardi Gras sized parade each week!  Join the fun with Rascal and RoccoBionic Basil’s BlogJan’s Funny FarmLove is being owned by a Husky, and me to celebrate.  Grab our badge and hop along!







30 comments :

  1. Happy Birthday Bentley's Mom. We have had similar conversations with our Mom - we are pretty sure she was sitting on on a beach on some far away planet watching as the BIG BANG happen :)

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  2. Bentley we sure hope your ancient mum had a great birthday..you know our mum is so old to..we feel sorry for the ole mums..they creak an moan an groan when they move..ours needs a grease and oil change think ....BOL..paw pats Forrest xx

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  3. Happy birthday to mum Bentley and we so know that feeling of having to explain things fro times past. Have a fabulous Friday.
    Best wishes Molly

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  4. HAPPY BURFDAY Mom!
    Psst Bentley, don't forget YOUR share of the CAKE!
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

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  5. Happy birthday!!!!!! Enjoy your day!

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  6. LOL what a great interview. Happy Birthday to you mom Bentley:)

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  7. A super happy birthday to your mom! I know my mom is older than the hills too, so we need to be nice to these old fogies! Maybe find some senior food or joint supplements for her. Probably the best thing is to just cuddle her and give her lots of loving today. Old moms love that kind of stuff.

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  8. Love the interview. A pillow or a new hip... LOL Happy Birthday!

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  9. Happy Birthday to your mom! How great that she can celebrate with Brians momma :o) Enjoy a fabulous day and a giiiiiiiiant cake :o)
    easy rider

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  10. Happy Birthday to you mom! I hope that it is the best one ever. Let her eat some cake Bentley! If you have to get older, you should at least get some delicious cake out of it :)
    - Purrs from you friends at www.PlayfulKitty.net

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  11. Happy birthday to your mom! And she's not old!
    --Wags (and purrs) from Life with Dogs and Cats

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  12. Have a wonderful birthday surrounded by your pack, Melissa! I loved Bentley's interview, he sure is a little jokester, that Bentley ;-)

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  13. Happy Birthday, and a world of Frogs!!! Love you!!

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  14. Happy happy happy Birthday!!!!!!!!
    ღ husky hugz ღ frum our pack at Love is being owned by a husky!

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  15. OMD! Happy Happy Happy Burthday Bentley's Moms!!!! Bentley, I knows what you mean abouts the OLD PEEPS! I swear I saw Ma riding a T-Rex ... or an elephant..same thingie, right? ☺
    I hopes you guys have lots of cake and IScream!!
    Kisses,
    Ruby ♥

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  16. Happy Birthday to your mom. We think she is about as old as our mom.

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  17. Hee hee! What a fun interview with your Mom, Bentley. Happy birthday to her. We hope she has a super special day and year. :)

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  18. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...... MELISSA!!!!!!! WOO!!!! :-D

    Woofs from Earl, Ethel and I at Earl's World!

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  19. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM....well we gather from the question and answers that you are about the same age as our Dad.....now we ain't saying you guys are old ...but our Dad invented dirt! Barharhar!

    The Mad Scots & Mom

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  20. That was the best interview every, Bentley! I'm sure your Mom is enjoying her day in spite of the fact that you made her feel ancient. :)
    Happy Birthday, Mom! From the crew at Wag 'n Woof Pets

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  21. World Frog Day!?! How did wes miss that!?! Wes LOVES frogs! Now mes will sing your Mommy the Birthday Song!!!
    Mee!!
    Meeee!!!!
    Meeeeee!!!!!!!
    *•.¸¸♪♫•Happy Birthday to you ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♪♫•¸¸.•*
    ¨*•♫♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♪♫•
    ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪ Happy Birthday Dear Bentley's Mommy!!!!! ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♪♫•
    ¸¸.•*¨*•♫♪ Happy Birthday to you! ♪♫•*¨*•.¸¸♪♫•
    Kisses
    Nellie

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  22. Happy Birthday to the momma
    Lily & Edward

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  23. Woohoo :-) Happy Happy Birthday! Have a PAWsome celebration. Golden Woofs

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  24. Cute interview, you did a great job Bentley. Happy Birthday Melissa!

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  25. Oh Bentley, that was Cold! Your mama doesn't need a new hip, that's at least 2 or 3 years away! I hope you had a very, very HAPPY BIRTHDAY, M.K.!!
    Love & Biscuits
    Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them

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  26. Cute interview! Happy belated birthday!

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  27. Wait - a pillow or a NEW HIP? Bentley! That's a FARADAY style comment! MOL!! (very sweet interview :-)

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