Monday, April 1, 2019

BFTB NETWoof News April 1, 2019

Bentley Basset Hound: “Hello and welcome to BFTB NETWoof News for the first day of April 2019. We have stories that you won’t see ANYWHERE else today so let’s have Pierre fetch our top story.”
Pierre Westie: “The Bayou Boys have been in touch with NASA after Bentley was spotted on radar in his private rocket. The scientists were so impressed with the craftmanship of the Hound Dog #7 Rocket Pack, they are planning on a mission to the moon in early 2020. Stay tuned for updates.”
Bentley: “Speaking of scientists, a recent in-depth study proves that rolling in stinky stuff is not only great for dogs but can improve sinus congestion in humans. It seems the rancid smell can actually be smelled by someone whose nostrils have been completely clogged.  Everyone is urged to allow their dogs roll in whatever they might find interesting. Baths are not recommended after these stink rolls.”
Pierre: “Everybody wants to be a cat, especially now that the newest home fashion craze is “Cat Shred Chic”. That’s right say goodbye to all of those scratching posts because your humans are going to beg you to shred their couch, recliner and bed! If you want to be on the cutting edge of home décor, it might be a good idea to start shredding the curtains now.”
Bentley: “A new law taking effect on this April 1st will enable dogs and cats to surrender their unwanted humans at their local shelter. If your humans have gotten old, talk incessantly, you need to move, or they just aren’t fun anymore, you can now dump them at the nearest human society.
   Excuse me, we have an update to this law. It seems no dogs or cats would ever give up or abandon their humans. They’re love is unconditional and unending.
   I’m sorry, it seems we have an update to our update. There is a cat outside of Detroit that is considering their humans latest action and deciding the next step. It seems her food was not warmed to her satisfaction and it was delivered two minutes late. I don’t know but that could just be lack of training on the cat’s part. Training humans requires patience and if you rescued them, then it can be even more trying. Humans need to be reminded of feeding times with extremely loud meowing or barking. Staring is also a good option. We will keep you posted but I think a little extra catnip and all will be forgiven.
   How is the weather forecast Paisley?”
Paisley the Weather Lab: “I am happy to report the weather is going to be perfect all over the country. Blue skies with the sun shining and birds singing. Flowers will begin to bloom and there will be a gentle breeze. The pollen has dissipated, and everyone’s allergies should clear up.
   You should tune into your local stations for updates or warnings in your area.”
Bentley: “We hope you enjoyed today’s BFTB NETWoof News and Weather. There is just one more thing I have to say on behalf of the entire news team…
😂HAPPY APRIL FOOLS’ DAY🤡
   It was the perfect time to have some fun in the news room and we hope you got a snicker with us. We made up all of today’s news and weather. Have you ever played an epic April Fools’ joke on someone? Tell us in the comments! 
   We will be back on Wednesday for this week’s Pet Parade. Have a great day and don’t forget to grab yourself some happy!
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18 comments :

  1. oh we love that fabulous news... let's roll immediately in something stinky... it's for the science and for da world peace LOL

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  2. We LOVED your news this week but you in your private rocket with your roller skates on has us rolling on the floor, Bentley! We are loving it☺ Happy April!

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  3. Cat Shred Chic...I and LAFFINGS sooooo hard over that one
    Happy April Fools day
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

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  4. Happy April Fool's Day, to all. Great fools stories.

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  5. Another great edition of the news. I wonder if cat shred chic is anything like poodle slicing? BOL

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  6. We have long believed in the health benefits of rolling in stinky stuff...no fooling.

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  7. The ability to return your human is a great piece of news!! Way to go!!! LOL!!!!!

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  8. Wow! So my kitty cat cousins have been at the height of fashion all along! Do holes chewed in furniture by puppies count as fashionable? Maybe my shredded squeaky toys will be framed and displayed in a gallery? BOL!

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  9. Bravo and giggles. So a roll in the hay causes hay fever but a roll in poop will clear it up lickety split. Your reporting is top notch.

    On more than one occasion Angle Madi issued demerits for late meals.
    Hugs Cecilia

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  10. Another great start to my week thanks to you! Have a wonderful week!

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  11. Definitely didn't see these stories anywhere else :) Happy April Fool's Day!

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  12. Actually, I wish dogs and cats could turn in lazy owners!

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  13. BOLBOL!! Even your tricksy news is fun!
    We sure wish that forecast was real!
    xoxo,
    Rosy, Jakey & Arty

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  14. BOL!! You guys are too too funny!
    hugs
    Hazel & Mabel

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  15. BOL!!!! I loves it! Hey, you thinks there will ever be 'Dog Shred Chic'??? If so, I'm gonna be a BILLIONAIRE!! oh the margaritas I could buy....
    Kisses,
    Ruby ♥

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  16. That was fun guys! We sure wish the weather forecast was true, and the thing about the cats. We'd have to do a lot less decorating (and repairs!) ourselves if that were true! :)
    Jan, Wag 'n Woof Pets

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  17. ewww my gang is always rolling in stinky stuff

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