The Truth About Working Dogs

I was busy picking up Bentley and Pierre’s toys the other day when I happened to mention that they should be helping me. Once they quit laughing, they explained to me how much they do on a daily basis that is simply unappreciated. It seems the Bayou Boys feel they are not being properly compensated with the occasional treat.

Here is your chance to be a fly on the wall in my home.

Me: “Did y’all know that some dogs pick up their own toys? I shouldn’t have to go all over the house picking up your toys. Would it kill you to do a little work around here?”

Bentley: “I cannot believe my ears! You’re lucky you don’t have to pay us in cash for all of the jobs we do around here. It’s not easy being a working dog.”

Me: “Now it’s my turn to laugh! You boys don’t work. Mostly y’all sit around looking cute, mooching belly rubs, and going outside so you can bark and come back inside. That’s not exactly what I’d call work.”

Pierre: “You cut us to the quick! It would cost a fortune to hire humans to do the jobs we perform for you. Let’s take a quick look at what we do each day. You might want to grab a calculator.”

Bentley: “Guard Duty ~ Do you know how much people charge to be your personal guard defending you, Dad, and our home? We don’t want to scare you, but we’ve almost come under attack by sanitation workers, mail carriers, and small humans riding bikes more times than we can count. If we didn’t bark at them, we’d surely all be dead by now.”

  Pierre: “Personal Trainer ~ If you hired someone to get you moving each day, well, you couldn’t afford it.  Selflessly, I urge you to get outside and walk. Should I mention the exercise I get you to do every time that you try to give me a bath? Chasing me through the house is good cardio. It’s great also for your knees. Of course, you probably thought I just didn’t want to be groomed. No appreciation. Am I right, Bentley?””

  Bentley: “You are preaching to the choir, Pierre. What about being the live Floor Sweeper/vacuum ~ Take a look at our floors. Do you see food crumbs or spills anywhere? Nope, that’s because we are ever vigilant about immediately removing any food or beverage the instant it hits the floor.  We have total disregard for the 5-second rule because nothing lasts five seconds on our floor!”

Pierre: “Greeter/Social Director ~ I am always the first one to the door to greet our guests. I welcome them; sniff them for any food bombs, or other dogs. I lead them to the living room where I stay and work the crowd with a few tricks. Let’s face it; I have saved more than one social event from being humdrum. Party planners bring in big bucks for entertaining.”

Bentley: “Psychiatrist ~ I guess this is our most important job. Most psychiatrists charge by the half hour and don’t even ask what they charge. We listen to you, give you a shoulder to cry on, kiss it all better, and when we are through with our sessions, you always feel 100% better. As you can see we work 24/7 and never see a single dime. It is a good thing that we love you so much and are willing to work free. If humans had to pay for all their dog’s services rendered each day, nobody could afford us. Don’t even get us started on the things cats do for their humans!”

Me: “Gosh boys, I never realized how much you both do in a single day. It’s no wonder you need so many naps. Why don’t y’all keep relaxing? I’ll get the toys put away before I give y’all a treat. I am such a lucky pet mom.”

Bentley: “That’s okay. We are just glad that you understand now. By the way, it is Labor Day weekend and we were hoping Dad would fire up the grill. Maybe a couple of burgers for your hard-working dogs. We’ll just stretch out here in the sun and wait for something to bark at…it shouldn’t be too long.”

*What jobs do your dogs do each day? Are they working dogs, or do they work at being dogs? Let me know in your comments.

Happy Labor Day Weekend 

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