Friday, August 31, 2018

The Truth About Working Dogs

I was busy picking up Bentley and Pierre’s toys the other day when I happened to mention that they should be helping me. Once they quit laughing, they explained to me how much they do on a daily basis that is simply unappreciated. It seems the Bayou Boys feel they are not being properly compensated with the occasional treat.
Here is your chance to be a fly on the wall in my home.
Me: “Did y’all know that some dogs pick up their own toys? I shouldn’t have to go all over the house picking up your toys. Would it kill you to do a little work around here?”
Bentley: “I cannot believe my ears! You’re lucky you don’t have to pay us in cash for all of the jobs we do around here. It’s not easy being a working dog.”
Me: “Now it’s my turn to laugh! You boys don’t work. Mostly y’all sit around looking cute, mooching belly rubs, and going outside so you can bark and come back inside. That’s not exactly what I’d call work.”
Pierre: “You cut us to the quick! It would cost a fortune to hire humans to do the jobs we perform for you. Let’s take a quick look at what we do each day. You might want to grab a calculator.”
two dogs looking out window
Bentley: Guard Duty ~ Do you know how much people charge to be your personal guard defending you, Dad, and our home? We don’t want to scare you, but we’ve almost come under attack by sanitation workers, mail carriers, and small humans riding bikes more times than we can count. If we didn’t bark at them, we’d surely all be dead by now.”
Westie taking a bath
  Pierre: “Personal Trainer ~ If you hired someone to get you moving each day, well, you couldn’t afford it.  Selflessly, I urge you to get outside and walk. Should I mention the exercise I get you to do every time that you try to give me a bath? Chasing me through the house is good cardio. It’s great also for your knees. Of course, you probably thought I just didn’t want to be groomed. No appreciation. Am I right, Bentley?””
Basset next to Bissell steam cleaner
  Bentley: “You are preaching to the choir, Pierre. What about being the live Floor Sweeper/vacuum ~ Take a look at our floors. Do you see food crumbs or spills anywhere? Nope, that’s because we are ever vigilant about immediately removing any food or beverage the instant it hits the floor.  We have total disregard for the 5-second rule because nothing lasts five seconds on our floor!”
West Highland White Terrier
Pierre: “Greeter/Social Director ~ I am always the first one to the door to greet our guests. I welcome them; sniff them for any food bombs, or other dogs. I lead them to the living room where I stay and work the crowd with a few tricks. Let’s face it; I have saved more than one social event from being humdrum. Party planners bring in big bucks for entertaining.”
Woman with two dogs on bed
Bentley: Psychiatrist ~ I guess this is our most important job. Most psychiatrists charge by the half hour and don’t even ask what they charge. We listen to you, give you a shoulder to cry on, kiss it all better, and when we are through with our sessions, you always feel 100% better. As you can see we work 24/7 and never see a single dime. It is a good thing that we love you so much and are willing to work free. If humans had to pay for all their dog’s services rendered each day, nobody could afford us. Don’t even get us started on the things cats do for their humans!”
Me: “Gosh boys, I never realized how much you both do in a single day. It’s no wonder you need so many naps. Why don’t y’all keep relaxing? I’ll get the toys put away before I give y’all a treat. I am such a lucky pet mom.”
Bentley: “That’s okay. We are just glad that you understand now. By the way, it is Labor Day weekend and we were hoping Dad would fire up the grill. Maybe a couple of burgers for your hard-working dogs. We’ll just stretch out here in the sun and wait for something to bark at…it shouldn’t be too long.”
*What jobs do your dogs do each day? Are they working dogs, or do they work at being dogs? Let me know in your comments.
Happy Labor Day Weekend 
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  1. ooooh it seems we a work mates ;O) we have nearly the same jobs and we also have to do a lot of girlish stuff with the mama... but .... do you think that this dogs really exist who pick up their toys?

  2. We all work hard too. Taking care of humans is a huge undertaking and a dog should not attempt it without serious thinking first. The work is well worth it for the food, lodging, and love we get in return, right, boys?

  3. Mom would be lost without me and all of the work I do around here for her! I hope you guys get your burgers. You sure do deserve them!

  4. Bentley & Pierre are so right, humans are lucky we don’t ask for cash for our skillful duties.
    As the CEO of our business I keep huMom tying knots, stuffing & sewing toys for other furbabies to enjoy while I toss about toys, eat treats & pose for photo shoots.
    Q & I bark at all intruders 2 legged or 4.
    Keeping the huMom fit with walkies & hikes is a physical job but someone has to keep her healthy.
    One of the most important jobs I have is being the bed warmer. Who wants to slide between cold sheets?

    Nose nudges,
    CEO Olivia

  5. We scare away the psycho axe murderer on a daily basis. That is beyond valuable

  6. Ha!! This was great! I better not let Dakota see this...his main jobs are Security and Psychiatry but Cody is our resident greeter lol. Have a great holiday!

  7. You two are overworked underpaid and under appreciated!! MY word...I think you need to go on strike. Great post
    Hugs madi your bfff

  8. Whew...we are tired just thinking of all us pups do for our humans...We might need a nap to prepare for the day!!

  9. Well really, you can't argue with that canine logic - these boys have got a point! I say you beg their forgiveness and hand over the liver treats LOL!
    Love & Biscuits,
    Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them

  10. BOL - you did a pawesome job, Bentley and Pierre - you sure told Mom the what-for. We hope you get those burgers or better still make a steak or two!

    Happy Labor Day Weekend.

    Woos - Lightning, Misty, and Timber

  11. Great job by all of you, Bentley, Pierre and Mom! Now that you're all on the same page about how hard you all work ... enjoy your well-deserved Labor Day weekend! :)

  12. You boys deserve a big raise for all that work you do. Your humans don't appreciate you enough. ;)

  13. Preachin' to the choir boyz! If it weren't for MOI, Ma would be bored to tears! Oh, and she would have to spend a FORTUNE on hair gel....I gives it to her free...SLOBBER! (with a subtle liver scent....)
    Keep up the good work boyz!
    Ruby ♥

  14. You pups need to refer to the Yum Yum Coalition Guide to Doggie Employment, by my late, esteemed colleague Joseph (Joey dog) Spaniel. Monetary compensation consists of yum yum doggie treats. Standard for a photo shoot is two treats. The Double Doggie Homeland Security System worked for kibble: two cups a day (but barking was always free.) Everything else was compensated by samples from the table.

  15. BOL... You got dat right. We have tons of jobs and are unappreciated. Humans.... go figure.

  16. Yup, we have to agree with the boyz on this. Well done guys. Where you travel agents in a previous life cuz you sure know how to send the mom on a guilt trip? {snicker}
    Your friends,
    Sam & Elsa 🐾

  17. We guess they told you, Mom! LOL. BTW, when we had our Labor Day BBQ, there was a burger on the grill for Luke as well. We thought the boys would appreciate that. :)
    Jan, Wag 'n Woof Pets


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