Thursday, June 16, 2016

Misunderstood Working Dogs

I was busy picking up Bentley and Pierre’s toys the other day when I happened to mention that they should be helping me. Once they quit snickering, they both explained to me how much they do that goes unappreciated each and every day. It seems the Bayou Boys feel they are not being properly compensated. This is how the conversation progressed.
Me: “I shouldn’t have to bribe y'all. You should help because I asked.”
Bentley: “You are lucky that you don’t have to pay us cash for all of the different jobs we do around here. It’s not easy being a working dog.”
Me: “You boys don’t work. Mostly y’all sit around looking cute, mooching belly rubs, and chasing squirrels.”
Pierre: “You cut us to the quick! I’ll have you know that it would cost you a fortune to hire or buy all of the services that we provide for you. Let’s take a quick look at what we do each day.
Bentley: Guard Duty ~ Do you know how much those humans make to sit or stand guard? We don’t want to scare you, but we’ve almost come under attack by sanitation workers, mail carriers, and small humans riding bikes more times than we can count. If we didn’t bark at them, we’d surely all be dead by now.”
Pierre: “Exterminator ~ What about all of those moles and lizards that I’ve trapped and killed for you?  Where’s my compensation for that unpleasant job?  You won’t even let me eat my catch.”
Bentley: “Dishwasher ~ Think how much you save by me pre-cleaning the dishes. All of that stuck-on food would take some elbow grease for you to remove. I don’t even complain that you ate all of the food in front of me.”
  Pierre: “Personal Trainer ~ If you hired someone to get you moving each day, well, you couldn’t afford it.  Selflessly, I urge you to get outside and walk. Should I mention the squats I get you to do every time that you brush me? That is great for building leg strength. Maybe I could bring in some cash with an infomercial DVD.”
Bentley: “Seat Filler/Warmer ~ There are times that I climb on the couch and it is cold.  I use the warmth of my Basset Hound body to generate heat resulting in you having a comfy, cozy place to sit. I cannot believe that you actually accuse me of stealing your spot!”
Pierre: “Greeter/Social Director ~ I am always the first one to the door to greet our guests. I welcome them; sniff them for any food bombs, or other dogs. I lead them to the living room where I stay and work the crowd with a few tricks. Let’s face it; I have saved more than one social event from being humdrum. Party planners bring in big bucks for entertaining.”
Bentley:Floor Sweeper/vacuum ~ Take a look at our floors. Do you see food crumbs or spills anywhere? Nope, that’s because we are ever vigilant about immediately removing any food or beverage the instant it hits the floor.  We have total disregard for the 5-second rule.”
Pierre:Personal Wake-Up Service ~ Have we ever let you oversleep? Most folks can’t afford a personal wake-up service and if they can, they usually just get a phone call. You are treated to loving licks and pawing by not just one but two handsome dogs. You can’t put a price on personal service.”
Bentley: “Baby Sitter ~ Who is going to let you know when our new baby needs to be changed? This nose will know. Pierre and I are going to teach her lots of fun things too like dropping cookies and playing ball.”
Pierre: “Gardener ~ There is no way to count the holes that I have dug for you. I have dug up dozens of flowers weeds without being asked. I also make my own fertilizer that you insist on removing and I aerate the grass.  When times are tough, I’ll even eat some of the grass to keep it level. A good gardener doesn’t come cheap, you know.”
Bentley: Psychiatrist ~ I guess this is our most important job. Most psychiatrists charge by the half hour and don’t even ask what they charge. We listen to you, give you a shoulder to cry on, kiss it all better, and when we are through with our sessions, you always feel 100% better. As you can see we work 24/7 and never see a single dime. It is a good thing that we love you so much and are willing to work free. Actually, if humans had to pay for all of their dog’s services rendered each day, nobody could afford us.”
Me: “Gosh boys, I never realized how much you both do in a single day. It’s no wonder you need so many naps. Why don’t y’all keep relaxing while I get the toys put away. Then, I'll get my hard-working boys each a treat. I am such a lucky pet mom.”
Bentley: “Heh, heh, heh! We almost feel guilty about playing on Mom’s emotions. She is such a softie and we know all of her buttons to push! She’ll feel better once she gives us our treat. Bless her heart.”


*What jobs do your dogs do each day? Are they working dogs or do they work at being dogs? Let me know in your comments. 

It is Thoughtless Thursday’s blog hop with Ruckus the EskieLove is being owned by a Husky and me. The rules are, there are no rules!



23 comments :

  1. My dogs have a similar work schedule. I guess I'm selling them short. Time to get them more treats for all the hard work they put in day in and day out.

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  2. Phew, I'm exhausted reading all your hard work-think I'll go and take a nap to recover
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

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  3. My sisters and I work like dogs every day too and often it is truly thankless work, but we do it because it is important work! Good job turning that picking up nonsense around to your favor!

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  4. wowo that really means working like a dog... I hope the payment is in chewing bones or in ice cream :O)

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  5. BOL Bless her heart is right, boys! The parents have no idea how much work we do all day every day!

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  6. Holee Molee....you just gave me a lot to think about!!! I am definitely being underpaid! :)
    (In Other Words....not paid at all) BOL

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  7. You two are BRILLIANT... You are Geniuses THIS was a GRRRREAT and GRAND Post... WELL DONE!!!

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  8. Now my dogs are picketing for more compensation. Thanks a lot.

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  9. Good grief! I'm ready to write those boys a check for all they do! Adorable perspective. And now, knowing how hard they work each and every day, I need to take a nap. I'm worn out just reading about it all. ☺️

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  10. Oh boy you two look like big bad guard dogs
    Snorts,
    Lily & Edward

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  11. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  12. MOL - I'm a Working Cat. Alarm clock, exterminator (takin care of lizards and flies), entertainment, well, ya names it!

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  13. AND you keep the peeps' blood pressure down when they stroke you! Sheesh! We're going to have to review our contract. SHE owes us bigtime!

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  14. We have to say that the boys have a lot of good points there! The biggest job around here is the guard duty....they are always on it, alert to any noise, smell, or movement of any kind outside the house. No alarm system needed here!
    Considering the amount of money we spend around here on food, treats, and toys though, I'd say they are pretty well compensated! :)
    Jan, Wag 'n Woof Pets

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  15. We work hard too...and all we get are some treats. We deserve so much more! And so do you, Bentley and Pierre.

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  16. OMD, I thinks I'm goin' on STRIKE!!! I don't gets paid for ANYTHINGS!!! NOTHIN'!!!! What?? okay. Ma just told me that I have to tell you that "i'm full of shite." I gets lots of treaties and very good foodables, and that rubbing my arse on her pillow is NOT an occupation!!!!
    whatevers. Can I come and lives with you????
    Kisses,
    Ruby ♥

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  17. Oh boy..I think it's time for us to start tallying how much we do too!!
    Smileys!
    Dory, Jakey, Arty & Bilbo

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  18. hahahaha cute, they have fabulous jobs and are good at them.

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  19. Well, Melissa you can't possibley argue with this sound logic!! Get those dogs some high value treats!
    Love & biscuits,
    Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them

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  20. Way to go, Bentley and Pierre. You really set your mom straight . . . and now our mom has a whole new appreciation for all we do around here!

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