Tuesday, March 20, 2018

An Interview with a Really Old Mother

Bentley Basset Hound: “It’s Mom’s birthday and we always enjoy interviewing her on this momentous occasion. Pierre and I have written down some of our burning questions so let’s get right to them.”
Woman with Westie dog
Pierre Westie: “Happy birthday Mom! How are you feeling? At your age, aches and pains must be a part of life. Exactly how old are you anyway?”
Me: “You aren’t supposed to ask a lady her age. Let’s just say I’m not quite a senior citizen.”

Bentley: “I think it’s safe to say that even though you were born on March 20th, you are no spring chicken. Let’s get down to the nitty-gritty and discuss life when you were a child. How did you avoid dysentery when traveling by covered wagon? I understand it was a real problem on the Oregon Trail.”
Me: “I didn’t travel by covered wagon. We had cars back in those days. We did have to get a vaccination against smallpox on our left arm. I still have a small circular scar. I don’t recall dysentery being an issue, but I appreciate your concern.”
Pierre: “When you went to school, was it difficult to write on stone tablets? I can only guess at how many pencils you went through on a daily basis! Speaking of school, did a dinosaur come by to pick you up each morning like on The Flintstones?”
Me: “Seriously? There were no dinosaurs and we wrote on Big Chief tablets made from actual paper! Most of the kids rode bikes or walked to school. I didn’t even have to walk through mounds of snow or walk 3 miles uphill to get there.”
Woman hugging Basset Hound
Bentley: “I’m kinda disappointed about the lack of dinosaurs. You’d have looked so cute on the back of a brontosaurus. Since you claim not to be that old, let’s talk about the subjects you studied. History must have been an easy A+ since there wasn’t much of it. I’ll bet you could name all two of the presidents!”
Me: “I hate to tell you this but there had been 34 presidents by the time I was born but would be hard-pressed to name them. Luckily, we used to have rulers with all the presidents listed on them. America seemed more patriotic back in the early 60’s. Of course, it was before the Vietnam war which changed the mindset of a lot of Americans.
   There were a lot of things that needed to change in the 60’s and 70’s. Many of those changes have been very good. For instance, dogs and cats have much better lives than they did when I was a child. Nobody prepared homemade meals for their dogs like Dr. Harvey’s. There were maybe two or three choices of dry kibble or canned food but no telling what was in them. There weren’t animal rescues either. Unwanted pets were sent to the pound and I don’t want to tell you what happened to them there. Y’all would have probably been yard dogs and slept in a wooden dog house on some hay.”
Pierre: “Now you’re just trying to scare us into easing up on the tough questions. We can’t imagine not having a posh bed in every room and two fresh meals with our healthy supplements added. It will serve you right if I wake you up from having nightmares of such horror stories! A dog house with hay indeed!
   Seriously, did you like growing up in the 60’s and 70’s? It seems so weird that you didn’t have computers or the internet. How did people know what you ate for dinner if there was no Facebook? Where did you post selfies?”
Me: “It was not a bad time to grow up, but kids today have it much easier as far as access to information. Social media is great but can cause a lot of problems that we didn’t experience. There were no cyber bullies, they had to be mean to our faces!
   We had cameras with film in them but you had to get them developed at the store. You never knew if they would turn out good or too blurry to see until after you paid for them. Selfies weren’t a thing either although that might have been one of the benefits. I’m very thankful there is no photographic evidence online of the stupid things I did as a teenager!
   I’d never want to go back to relive my youth but I’m glad that my past led me to where I am today.”
Woman with Basset Hound and Westie
Bentley: “I’m sure you’re referring to our family, the Barking from the Bayou empire and being a mom to the two most amazing dogs in the world. Am I right??”
Me: “You forgot modest, but yes, that’s exactly what I meant. I’ve been extremely blessed. I love you, boys.”
Pierre: “We love you too. Happy birthday, Mom!”
Fetch your best friend some pawsome PrideBites gifts for Easter and save 20% with my PAWtner code: MKCLINTON




32 comments :

  1. Happy Birthday to your mama!!!! we agree it was different to meet the bullies face to face in the old times... even when you had the magic ring from a cereal pack what made you invisible ;O))))

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Luckily, we could see them coming with our super cool X-ray glasses! LOL!

      Delete
  2. Happy Birthday to your mom, Pierre and Bentley! Our mom's must have been born around the same time because mine sure did smile a lot when we read your post.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank so much! Mom is really old but she gives good belly rubs so we treated her special for her birthday.

      Delete
  3. Happy Birthday to your mom! Sometimes it is amazing to think of the tough life our moms had growing up in the dark ages, but they are strong and survived! Spoil her rotten today! Oh, Bailie sends some huggles her way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much! It is amazing they survived drinking from water hoses, riding bikes without helmets, no seat belts and only three television stations. How primitive can you get?!? LOL!

      Delete
  4. Happy Happy Birthday to your Mom. MOLMOLMOL good thing you two Bayou Boys are adorable and cute and loved to the moon and back. That interview was hilarious. I'm purrty sure mom my is older than dirt.
    Hugs madi your bfff

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Our mom is definitely older than dirt. We think she is from the stone age!

      Delete
  5. Happy birthday Mom! Ghostwriter remembers all of those things you mentioned (except the only dinosaurs she saw were on the Flintstones.)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much! Mom LOVED the Flintstones but says she is living in the Jetson's world these days. She is weird. LOL!

      Delete
  6. Happy Birthday!!! Do you remember when we celebrated your birthday on The Mayflower?? Ah, great times, great memories!!!! LMAO!!! LOVE YOU!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good times and that Chris Columbus was SUCH a hoot! ROFL! I love you too!

      Delete
  7. A very Happy Birthday to your Mama!!! You guys had some really great questions for her!!
    xoxo,
    Jakey, Arty & Rosy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We tried to ask the tough questions and dig up a little dirt on her. LOL!

      Delete
  8. MOL, what a fun interview ! Happy Birthday to your mom ! Purrs

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! We are devoted to seeking out the truth especially when it comes to things that happened in the Stone Age!

      Delete
  9. Happy Happy Birthday Mama!!!! We love you! This was HILARIOUS!! And............wait...oh yes you are a senior citizen! Hmmm...maybe I am wrong but I didn't think you were still in your 40s and if I just said that and you ARE in your 40s I am gonna die!!! Regardless I am MUCH older than you, I am 62!! DakotasDen

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. BAHAHAHAHA! I am on the way out of my 50's so you are safe. That means that you are NOT much older than me.

      Delete
  10. What a great interview. Happy Birthday to your mom.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! We like to grill her every chance we get.

      Delete
  11. Happy, Happy Birthday to your Mom! You boys really asked some burning questions there...you just can't ever stop being reporters, can you? :)
    Love from all of us at Wag 'n Woof Pets

    ReplyDelete
  12. Happy Birthday to your mom! Those questions made me laugh, but also served as a good reminder not to accept any interviews!

    ReplyDelete
  13. BOL!
    3 bum swings! 3 more! 💜

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO BENTLEY'S & PIERRE'S MOM!

    Nose nudges,
    CEO Olivia

    ReplyDelete
  14. Happy Birthday to your Mom! It is our Dad's birthday today too!
    hugs
    Hazel & Mabel

    ReplyDelete
  15. Happy Birthday to your wonderful, not old Mom. Today is a popular day for birthdays, the moms at Brian's Home and Eastside cats both have a birthday too.

    ReplyDelete
  16. What a great interview. It's wonderful learning more about your wonderful Mom. My Mom grew up in the 60's too. She is glad for all the freedoms they had then, playing outside, no helmets or smartphones. She wouldn't change a thing, she says, even if it means she is old now.

    Abby Lab

    ReplyDelete
  17. OMD, Ma grew up in the sixties and seventies too! she walked to school without a care in the world, and played outside alone without thinking twice about any creeps trying to snatch her scrawny arse up! butts, she said she had to go to the Library to gets her information for school, and look things up in something called Encyclopedia! kerazy! I hopes your Moms has the bestest Burthday evers!!!! And don't tells her she is old...that seems to make the Moms cranky....heheheeee
    HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BURTHDAY!!!!
    Kisses,
    Ruby ♥

    ReplyDelete
  18. OMD, as always, absolutely priceless! Much love and happy birthday wishes!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Wow, that's a tough lineup of birthday questions from the fur kids! You handled them very well. Hope you had a great birthday!
    Love & biscuits,
    Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them

    ReplyDelete
  20. Great post, happy belated birthday.

    ReplyDelete

I'd love to hear from you! Bark back!

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.