Thursday, November 8, 2018

Joking Around on the Bayou

Talking Dog 4 Sale
A guy is driving through town and sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog for Sale."
He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy walks into the backyard and sees an old dog sitting there.
"Do you really talk?" he asks. "Sure do," the hound replies. "Sooo, what's your story?" The guy’s curiosity is peaked.
The dog looks up and says, “Well, I discovered my gift of talking pretty young and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies eight years running.”
“The jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn’t getting any younger and I wanted to settle down. So, I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some serious crimes there and was awarded a bunch of medals.”
“That’s when I decided to settle down. I had a beautiful wife and a litter of puppies. Now I’m just retired.”
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner how much he wants for the dog.
The owner says, “Ten dollars.”
The guy says, “This dog is incredible. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?”
“Cause he’s a liar. He didn’t do any of that stuff!!”
One More
   A man is walking along the street when he sees a cute dog sitting next to a guy on the corner. He looks at the guy and asks “Does your dog bite?”
   “No, he’s very friendly.”
   The man reaches down to pet the dog and it bites his hand. Jerking his hand back he glares at the guy. “I thought you said your dog didn’t bite.”
    “That’s not my dog.”
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19 comments :

  1. We love that you started our day off with giggles and smiles☺ Thank you!

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  2. That first one is a good one. Made me smile.

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  3. LOL LOL LOL those were hilarious!!
    Hugs Cecilia

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  4. BOL!
    Pawsitively hairlarious my furiends 🐾

    💜nose nudges 💜

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  5. Oh my gawd, side splitting laughter at that first one! These are both so hilarious, thank for sharing - I so need a great laugh today, after a difficult week. Needless to say, I'm sharing this!
    Love & Biscuits,
    Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them

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  6. BOL - those are both very good. Thanks for making us laugh.

    Woos - Lightning, Misty, and Timber

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  7. LOL! GREAT jokes!

    Love and licks,
    Cupcake

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  8. We needed those laughs today, thanks guys!!
    Jan, Wag 'n Woof Pets

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  9. * GROOOOOAAAANNNN * and I thought I did terrible jokes * grin *

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